Dear Flight Attendant,
I'm sorry that you have to work on a pressurized tube that is hurtling through the sky at a ridiculous speed, but that does not, and I repeat DOES NOT, give you the right to hit me every time you pass with your drink cart. If you hit me one more time I'm going to have to make a scene...and no one wants that...especially the US Marshall being all "incognito" on the flight.
So please, let's just work this out together.
Sincerely,
Me
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