Apology #239

Dear Cranky Police Officer In The Unmarked Car Yesterday,

I'm sorry that you deal with jerks all day long. I'm sorry that this has skewed your view of people...although, I can't say that I'm surprised with the caliber of people you must interact with daily. I'm also sorry that you were trying to block my way home yesterday, but did such an unsuccessful job that I thought you were pulling someone over in a weird way instead of actually blocking said road.

Therefore, no need to be an a*hole when I apologize for trying to go around your weird stop...but at least you sort of melted when I explained that you just stopping in the road like you did, didn't really signify that things were closed...oh well...at least you are there to help us when things go wrong. And thank you for that.

Sincerely, Me

Apology #238

Dear Truck Drivers,

I'm sorry that you have to make a living by sitting on your butt for hours on end, getting hemmeroids, worrying about jerk drivers, and eating crap food... BUT that does not give you the right to give me the stink eye when I have the right of way (not just me thinking I have the right of way, but you are coming out of a parking lot and I am on the actual street...so real right of way) and you have to stop for me.

Maybe get more coffee.

Sincerely, Me

Apology #181

Dear Iced Over Street I Must Cross On My Way Into The Office Every Morning, I'm sorry you are icy. But I am not sorry that I have managed, so far, to stay upright while crossing you. Now that I have jinxed myself though, you and my bottom will soon be meeting in a very unfortunate way. Sincerely, Me

Apology #12

Dear Lady Who Almost Hit Me,

I'm sorry that I was driving in the fast lane, going 5.5mph faster than the speed limit, with my lights on this morning at 6:45...I'm sorry that you didn't see me when you decided you wanted to go faster than the dude in front of you...and I'm sorry that I had to honk at you when you tried to side swipe me.

Maybe next time you should check your blind spot.

Sincerely,
Me