Dear Spouse,
I'm sorry that I managed to scratch my chin sometime during the middle of the night and ended up with a nice scabby looking thing on my face. I tried to convince everyone that you don't hit me, but seeing as how I'm so accident prone and generally covered with mystery bruises, I don't think they believe me.
I guess I'll just have to prove my klutziness at work by tripping over my feet while carrying a steaming cup of coffee and landing on my face getting rug burn from the industrial carpet.
Or maybe just stop injuring myself (at least where it is visible).
Sincerely,
Me
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